All the Way to Heaven

Thanks to my friend Carol, I have been reading the above referenced book by Elizabeth Sherrill. Though I was not familiar with Sherrill at first thought, it turns out I have heard of some her writings, primarily The Cross and the Switchblade, which I read in high school, back, back in the shadows of time.


First of all, let me say that so far this is a fairly easy book to read. Little snippets of information, building the foundation of explanation of Sherrill's thoughts that unlike our typical view of heaven as a goal, her perspective is that heaven is now, today, in the moment as we walk with Christ.


I've not finished the book, so I can't speak to any conclusions drawn by Sherrill, but her premise is intriguing and comes at a time when I'm struggling with my faith. Since the first of the year, I've been posting to another blog with my sister and two friends. That blog was intended to be about improved health but has meandered over a number of areas including faith. All of us profess our Christian faith, but we all struggle at times with our walk, some of us more than others.


My struggle is that I came to my faith out of a sense of responsibility to provide a foundation for my son, who was a toddler when my mother died. My family of origin did not practice anything resembling a religion but rather muddled alone with a father who was searingly anti-Christian and a mother who professed to nothing, not even her country's standards of Shinto or Buddhism. When I married, my husband professed to be a Catholic but it seemed to be a really convenient religion that required little in terms of a daily or moment by moment relationship with God. So when I embraced my faith, I did it with little preparation outside of a need to build a foundation for my son.


I learned about Christ through helping with the Sunday school class my son attended. Adamant that I could never "teach" Sunday school, even to toddlers, I listened and learned both in the church, in my adult Sunday school class, but also with my son sitting in my lap listening to the Bible story. Thanks to the encouragement and clear teaching at my first church, I did get a solid education about Christ but it never felt like it went beyond the surface for me. Perhaps I was too consumed with making sure my son "got it" to realize that God was with teaching me too!


I have been privileged to know many strong women of faith in my life. Women who have have been my Bible study teachers, friends who walk their walk with Christ, boldly with what seems complete faith in their Jesus. Oh, how I have envied them these many years. To boldly entrust ones self to Christ's love and guidance has been my wish for a long time.


But I continue to struggle with doubts and feelings of inadequacy that I should be a more mature Christian, that I should have great trust in my faith. Perhaps I'm not that unusual. Perhaps many of us doubt our faith but wisely continue to walk their faith walk trusting that God will see them through. And to a great extend, that's what I've been doing most of the last twenty some years...walking the walk despite the misgivings, trusting that God is really there despite the feeling of being lost, trying to do His will even when overwhelmed with the sense of being inadequate.


My immediate goal is to develop a pattern of relationship with my God, to make Him my touchstone, to start my day with Him, to make now my heaven, not some utopian place for when I'm gone. Imagine, heaven on earth with your family and friends who you love and you can enjoy now!


I've signed up to get my Bible in One Year sent to me via email, I'm also getting a daily devotional emailed and my subscription to Guideposts should be starting soon...I know where my Bible is and I'm on page 60 of All the Way to Heaven...the hardest part will be to keep the commitment to not only do the reading, but the bigger issue of prayer...yes, that's where all this is going. I have no prayer life and it's proving to be a great void in my life. But we'll talk of that next time.